Actor Lukas Gage, known for his roles in The White Lotus and Euphoria, has publicly shared for the first time the traumatic experience of being sexually abused as a child. In his memoir, I Wrote This for Attention, Gage reveals that when he was just 11 years old, a counsellor at an acting camp sexually abused him. The actor recounted this deeply painful experience during an emotional interview on the Not Skinny But Not Fat podcast with Amanda Hirsch.
'I didn’t even realise it was a thing,' he said. 'I think there’s a real stigma behind it, because I didn’t do anything.' He explained how it was only in his twenties, through therapy, that he could fully grasp what happened. His therapist helped him understand the power imbalance, clarifying, '"You’re in your twenties, this person was in their twenties, would you ever do anything with an 11-year-old?" I’m like, no. No.' This slow recognition of abuse also involved feelings of dissociation: 'I left my body. There was a feeling that I was a willing participant.'
The memoir also documents Gage’s struggle to tell his mother about the abuse. He chose to do so by giving her a copy of the book, fearing the shame that still hangs over such disclosures. 'I sat her down and I was like, "Look, I hate talking about this. I hate having this talk with you. I hate having shame about it because we shouldn’t have shame about it."' Speaking to US Weekly, Gage reflected on how much it hurt to see his mother’s pain but was clear that she was not at fault. 'There was nothing she could’ve done to protect me. The world is a crazy, scary place, and you can only protect your kids so much.'
Humour has been a vital tool for Gage in reclaiming his story and coping with the trauma. He shared on the podcast how he leans into humour to regain power: 'Talking about the molestation, I feel like we [are expected] to be small when we talk about it. For me, that was a way for me to gain my power back... not let it make me feel weak and small and shameful.' He also noted how therapy and open conversations with loved ones have lifted the weight of shame, saying he no longer feels 'like I’m a weird freak that it happened to.'
Gage, who identifies as queer, has also spoken publicly about his journey to embracing his sexuality. He recounted the pivotal realisation during an appearance on the Seek Treatment podcast, revealing a formative relationship with a neighbour that lasted three years. His mother’s support upon learning about his sexuality has been a significant part of his personal and emotional growth.
I Wrote This for Attention is scheduled for publication by Simon & Schuster in October. Gage will be talking about it at the Leicester Square Theatre in London on 28th October. leicestersquaretheatre.com Source: Noah Wire Services